Bandages and Wires

My wonderful sister-in-law is doing a great job keeping everyone updated on my brother. She is posting a blog of your own and posting pictures and stories, good and bad, for all to read. Everyone keeps telling me I will be shocked when I see my brother. I feel like I know what to expect, but am holding out for the worse. I have been around my dad at his worse, so I imagine him being along the same lines. I think people forget that I have been through this before. She posted a picture of him, I believe I inserted the picture here (pretty new at this). I didn't like seeing the bandage by his neck or the feeding tube. He doesn't look all that bad. I kind of like the facial hair! To me, the feeding tube and bandage on his neck represents illness, and I don't want to think of his as sick.



I still think of my HILARIOUS brother that I can talk about anything to, sit with for hours without saying a word, hug, cuddle, wrestle, love. I know I can still do most of these with him and trust me I plan on it in a few weeks. I want to cherish every moment I have with him during the short time I am going to be there. I don't want to have bad thoughts in my head, just soak in all the new memories we can make in his home in Orlando.

All my life I have been "an emotional" eater. I never understood people not having an appetite or throwing up under stress, maybe I just have never felt this much stress. Anytime I think of my brother or look at this picture of him I get nauseas. My brother is my best friend, Maid of Honor, and one of the greatest men I have ever met. I can't imagine my life without him. I just can't accept it.

For now I try to have all positive thoughts. I know if anyone can make it through this it's him. He has a lot to live for and I know he isn't ready to leave it all behind. He is too much in love with his young bride and has so much love to give to the world.

Please continue to pray for my brother, his wife, my family, the doctors, and his salvation.

Thanks to everyone for their support. I know sometimes I am not in a great mood, I vent to you, and just seem grumpy. Just know that I am trying to be the best I can be during this time. I worry constantly about my dad and brother. I can't imagine my life without either of these great men!